


You killed my trust

by fangirl2013



Category: The White Queen (TV)
Genre: Disloyalty, Family, Medieval, Music angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-13
Updated: 2015-07-13
Packaged: 2018-04-09 03:58:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4333002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirl2013/pseuds/fangirl2013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You killed my only trust and it hurts<br/>Say goodbye<br/>I cannot bleed, it all turns red<br/>My hate for you has grown strong<br/>You see, I know what you said<br/>No more to have and to hold."</p><p>- "To have and to hold," Takida</p>
            </blockquote>





	You killed my trust

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SketchLockwood](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SketchLockwood/gifts).



> This is for someone very special. As with most of my writing right now, this is angsty but the Neville dynamic is interesting me right now. Anywhoo, I hope this isn't too terrible :)

Listening to the low murmuring around him, a scowl came to his tired, pale face. The night had been far from relaxing. Whenever John Neville turned, he'd be faced with gossiping ladies or scheming men. Did his brother truly believe him to be a fool? Completely oblivious to problems around him? He only needed ears to realise just what Dickon was planning. Even little Anne could guess.... that's if she hadn't already. He almost felt back at court. Being suffocated by the treachery and deceit of those around him. 

"Drink up, Johnny. You're very taciturn tonight." Dickon's voice held disapproval, as he approached him. There was a warm, happy almost carefree smile on his face and it instantly made John's scowl deepen. His brother was not, in his nature, a happy man. Whenever he seemed to be in a jovial mood, it was always down to something. Something that meant Johnny, at the sight, couldn't help but want to groan. 

He shook his head at his brother's order, not wanting to drink. Those around him seemed to be getting merrier by the second and he knew it was down to the gallons of wine being consumed. Even though, he should have felt at home with his relations, he felt anything but. He felt on edge, nervous and angry. His brother's dutiful facade was becoming harder for him to stomach, especially, as he knew it was all an act. A very well throughout act, nonetheless.

"I don't want to drink, brother." John murmured, his voice as passive as he could make it. His desire to bring up the subject of Richard's plan intense and strong in the pit of his stomach. Could he pretend he was unaware of it? Or even go along with it? It went against everything he'd been taught to believe. It went against his entire nature. 

Where was the loyalty in betraying those closest to you? In that moment, as he thought of what his brother was going to do, he felt anger rise up in him. His brother was complicating everything. His attention was caught, however, as a lady, whose name escaped him momentarily, shot him a small smile. It was polite, knowing even, as if she knew how he was feeling. John watched as her smile widened before raising her cup to him. Her bright eyes bore intensely into his and despite the anger inside him, he felt thankful for the distraction. 

He could feel his lips curving up, into a small smile, despite himself. After all, as he gazed at her, he couldn't help but notice her good looks. It would be far too easy to lose himself in her pretty smiles. He almost wanted to talk to her, to see if she sounded as pretty as she looked. 

Richard noticed his brother's inattention quickly, with a smirk. Especially, once he'd noticed just who had stolen his brother's attention away from him. Perhaps, Johnny was not the saint he made out he was. The look in his brother's eyes seemed to border on... desire. Or at least, he thought so.

"Oh, Johnny. Be careful. There's a saying, you know. A horse will ride to hell but if you place a woman on its back, it'll ride twice as fast." He pointed out, before ending in a hearty laugh. 

The laugh grated on John's nerves. It made him wince and want to gag Richard. His brother's insinuation was hardly founded, after all, he was merely looking at the lady. The hypocrisy of his brother's words didn't escape him, either. How many times had Richard strayed from the marriage bed? Too many times for his brother to recount. It only served to make him feel even angrier at him. Just like with the king, he was making things difficult. 

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He muttered to him, stiffly, gritting his teeth harshly. His gaze snapping abruptly away from the entrancing lady before him. Johnny wanted to snap at him, lash out and unleash the anger he was creating within him. It was because of him he was torn. 

Richard barely noticed his brother's tone. He was far too busy laughing at his words to notice. Once again, for the second time, he laughed heartily. It took all of John's resolve not to storm away from his brother. If only to stop himself from hitting him. 

"Of course you don't, my dear innocent brother." His voice proved no balm of comfort for John. Richard had sounded far too patronising for that.

As Richard walked away, laughing as he did, John's blood was boiling in his veins. No matter what his brother seemed to say or do, it intensified his feelings. Almost to the point it was similar to hatred.... The thought shocked him to the core. He'd been through battle after battle with his brother and each time, he'd known he wouldn't let him down. What on earth had happened to change that? The answer came to him immediately but even then, it left him with a sinking feeling.

'He'd always been like it. I was just too naive to notice.'

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment?


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